The Heart Work of Waiting

I currently live a mile down a dirt road. All dirt, all the time; not my plan! What was supposed to be a temporary living situation has morphed into the last 10 years of my life. I’m feeling impatient.

A friend gave me several large flower pots, and I decided to plant some beautiful flowers so I could have something nice to look at when I drove up the driveway. Pansies, petunias, ranunculus, and more were planted in these pots.

A few days later as I drove up the driveway, I noticed that the flowers were gone. Not only were they gone, but there wasn’t even a stub left! I began to sympathize with Elmer Fudd when I realized it was those cute little bunnies eating my flowers.

I went to the local nursery to share my woes with the owner. He asked, “What did you plant?” When I shared my colorful assortment, he replied, “Well, that’s like cotton candy for rabbits.” He recommended another flower from the ‘Balsaminaceae’ family that he thought would be more sustainable than the bunny smorgasbord I had been sponsoring. I went home and expectantly planted these colorful flowers.

A few days later as I drove up the driveway and viewed the colorful flowers in front of me, it was as if the Lord tapped me on the shoulder and said “These are for you.” You see, the popular name for these flowers are “impatiens” – pronounced like the word impatience. Yes, God does have a sense of humor. He was preparing my heart. 

My lesson had just begun. The following week I happened upon Ecclesiastes 7:8: “Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.” I thought that was an interesting contrast: the beginning from the end makes sense, but the patient and the proud? Shouldn’t it be the patient and the impatient? The truth of this contrast struck me hard—pride is the flip-side of patience!

But think about it, why am I impatient? Is it not because my timing is not happening, my plans are not laying out as expected? God hates pride (Prov. 8:13)! Yet, I had deceived my heart thinking it to be mere impatience.

I am still waiting, but am much more mindful of my heart’s response and am expectantly aware that my God is faithfully at work.

Laureen Mgrdichian, Women’s Ministry Director