How Do I Battle My Selfishness and Learn to Serve Others Better?
How Do I Battle My Selfishness and Learn to Serve Others Better?
Selfish (def.): Lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.
Unlike plants that need water and sunshine to grow, selfishness needs no nourishment to thrive. In fact, it is a weed. If you are familiar with weeds, you can attest that it is a battle to keep them from sprouting up. Action is needed!
Since there is no vaccine to eradicate it in our lives, let’s look at three tools that can help you identify and battle against it: Magnifying glasses, Presents, and Commas. What do these three things have in common with the topic of selfishness? I’m glad you asked!
Magnifying Glasses
Magnifying glasses allow us to see things that were not visible before. When was the last time you used one? The Holy Spirit is, for us, like a magnifying glass—He is one of the greatest leadership resources we have who works in us to honestly assess where our hearts are when it comes to the topic of selfishness. Consider Psalm 139:23-24 - “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Test me and know my thoughts. See if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” We cannot battle selfishness on our own. We need the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives to open our eyes and reveal the selfishness in our lives, empowering us in the battle against it.
Presents
Regarding gifts, I am a little embarrassed to admit that receiving them is one of my “love languages.” I heard this quote the other day: “Being in the presence of God is necessary for me to be a present for others.” How does this quote resonate with you? When I saw this quote, I loved the simplicity of its truth. It is only our time with God in His Word that transforms us. This then gives us what we need to serve others, to be a present, a gift to them. The kind of servant leader you are is shaped by who you are. God cares about the heart action of our serving, not the doing.
Commas
So, what do commas do? They are there to make you pause, to add a space between thoughts, making us slow down just a bit before we pick up and continue on. Many of us are living our lives like one long run-on sentence without needed pauses. We need to make space and add some margin around our lives for interruptions; otherwise, selfishness looks to protect our plan and our agenda. We have packed our days so full, that when even the smallest of interruptions come, we look to send this uninvited guest on its way as quickly as possible so we can get back to our plan.
What if we saw these interruptions as God-ordained divine appointments? Richard Fryling proposes this thought in his book, The Leadership Ellipse:
“When we are aware of the work of God in ordinary circumstances and people, we then pay closer attention to those people and to the promptings of God . . . We pay attention to others because in doing so we are paying attention to the work of God in their lives” (p. 173).
Magnifying glasses, presents, and commas. Do you see the similarity now? All three are handy in the battle against selfishness, helping us pay attention to God’s work and better equipping us to serve others. How is God using Covid-19 as a pause in your life? Pay close attention to the people around you and to the Lord’s promptings so that you are better able to effectively serve others.
Laureen Mgrdichian, Women's Ministry Director